A Love That Multiplies

The Duggar family knows what it is all about.  Their household has a very specific product, and everything is geared to make that product happen.  What is that product?  A responsible, contented child who knows he/she is loved.  By all accounts, this family accomplishes just that.

July 7, 2011

Talking to Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar for the first time is like talking to friends you’ve never met.  There is something disarming about talking to committed Christians; it’s as though they know you, because they know Christ.  Non-religious people miss out on that. 

Just about everyone knows about the Duggar family.  The foundation of their lives is their faith in God, and if naysayers want to dismiss that, then those folks will have to contend with the successful products coming out of the Duggar baby factory!  Kids who are well behaved, well groomed, well educated and on track to be welcome additions to society. 

I’d asked about Josie first, because she was the primary focus of the Duggar’s latest book, “A Love That Multiplies.”  Josie was born 3 ½ months prematurely, required a long hospital stay, and Michelle’s life was endangered due to preeclampsia.  From 22 ounces at birth (!), Josie is now 22 pounds.  “A miracle,” says Michelle.

This quote in the book made an impression on me:  “Good and bad run on parallel tracks, and they arrive about the same time.”  Attributed to the late pastor Ron Dunn, Jim Bob explained that waiting for everything to be just right before you do something or feel happy- isn’t advisable.  Michelle said give thanks in all things, good and bad, and see blessings come from that attitude. (It reminded me of Betsy ten Boom, thanking God for the fleas in her barracks at a concentration camp during WWII.  Those fleas saved them from the cruelest guard who wouldn't enter that barracks for the fleas!)

I'd asked about anger. With so many children there are ample opportunities to “practice” self-discipline around its expression.  Undisciplined expression of anger can do so much damage to a child, so Michelle offers Proverbs 15:1:  “A soft answer turns away wrath but grievous words stir up anger.”  Michelle doesn’t want her children to remember her as an angry, bickering nag – she wants to be remembered as a loving, encouraging mother.  SO she literally will whisper sometimes when she's angry, as a check against yelling.  She uses prayer and self-talk to bring her internal mercury column back to a manageable level.  She keeps the long view in mind – that is, her grown-up children who remember her well as a loving mother to them. 

I’d asked them about criticisms received that they were putting their kids through the wringer with the TV show.  Jim Bob answered that they feel the entire family has been called into the ministry, and that ministry is modeling to the world how a conservative, Christian family lives.  Such a personal conviction isn’t something most people will scoff at, although there are of course people who still do. 

Michelle said their goals are two fold, and if they accomplish these two things they will be a success: 1) Love God with all your heart, soul, and mind and 2) Love and serve others.  They teach this by looking for ways to show gratitude, writing notes of recognition and encouragement (that included the garbage man one day!), and going on mission trips to El Salvador.  There are plenty of suggestions about how to create unselfish young people on the Duggar family website, at www.duggarfamily.com. 

This is a family who doesn’t tell everyone else what to do.  They go about their life and business with humility and love.  I only wish there were more people like them.

Thanks to Michelle and Jim Bob Duggar for taking time out to visit with me on The Mary Reichard Show.  Michelle will speak this coming November 11-12, 2011 in Springfield, MO at Second Baptist Church, Battlefield Road.  The topic?  Laughing, she said,  “Anything from diapers to driver’s ed!”